"And of the Witch?...She was dead, dead and gone, and all that was left of her was the carapace of her reputation for malice."
Independent Elphaba Thropp from Gregory Maguire's Wicked.
Strictly Book Based

Written by Zoe

READ RULES

Baby RP Starters!

"I've looked up things about your symptoms.. Are you pregnant?"
"You.. You're pregnant?!"
"I'm gonna be a dad.. I'm going to be a dad!"
"I would never leave you.. I'm so excited for this baby."
"As the aunt/uncle of this baby, it is my right to spoil it."
"___ You two are not ready to have a baby, I can't believe it."
"Who's the spawn of satan? You are!"
"Either that was a really bad cramp, or I'm having contractions."
"Don't be mad at me but... I think I might be pregnant.."
"You know how you said you've always wanted a family? Well.. now we have that chance. I'm pregnant!"
"The protection didn't work, okay?! Now we're having a baby!"
"We.. We can't have a baby! Are you kidding me?!"
"Look at him/her.. She's perfect."
"If that stupid doctor tells me one more hour, i'm going to kill them!"
"Well I think you just broke my hand.."
"I lost the baby."
"We.. We lost the baby?"
"He left me when I told him..."
"What about adoption?"
"I went to the doctor.. and... well.. I don't know how to say this.."
"That one night stand was the biggest mistake of our lives.."
"I'm pregnant and I have no idea who the father is."
"I'm scared, ____! I don't know how to raise a baby!"
"What if they don't want the baby, and leave me?"
"The baby kicked!"
"It's really hard to cuddle with you when i'm this fat.."
"I'm so helpless and fat, I hate being pregnant."
"For the last time, you're not fat. You're pregnant."
"I hate you for doing this to me.."
"You're in labor?!"
"You alright? Is something wrong with the baby?"
"Shit.. hospital.. hospital now..!"
"It's a boy/girl."
"I want to name them ______"
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Maternity Memes

defiantcharms:

grumblygardens:

Memes about motherhood, having babies, and parenting. Some borderline NSFW and mildly offensive. Includes adoption!

Pregnancy& Motherhood

  • “But you’re hardly showing!”
  • “You are really big now!”
  • “Maybe it’s time to shop for something more flattering?”
  • “Maternity wear. You. You’ve gone without it for too long.”
  • “Did you hear the baby’s heartbeat?”
  • “How far along are you?”
  • “So when are you due?”
  • “Do you have nursery themes picked out?”
  • “Are you having a little boy or a little girl?”
  • “I know you went to get the ultrasound done.”
  • “You have to tell me if pregnancy sex is as kinky as I’ve heard it is!” 
  • “Just consider gender neutral colors for a second. Hear me out.”
  • “I’m just saying gendered colors are not as evil as people make them out to be.”
  • “You’re certain the baby isn’t someone else’s right?” 
  • “You can’t clean the cat box. There’s other stuff you can’t do while pregnant, either.”
  • “If you get put on bedrest, your entire house will fall apart and you know it.”
  • “So I guess you’ll go straight back to work after this?”
  • “Goodbye working world, hello stay-at-home-mommy! Right?”
  • “Your feet have got to be killing you!”
  • “Your boobs are gonna get so huge!” 
  • “You know you’ll be sore from breastfeeding, right?”
  • “So I guess you’re gonna pick a side in that breastfeeding and bottlefeeding thing, right?”
  • “I hope you’re not afraid to accept some help. You’ll need it.”
  • “I hope s/he is going to be pitching in more?”

Adoption

  • “You’re not gonna keep it, right? I mean face it, you’re not parenthood material!”
  • ”I understand you don’t want to keep the baby and I support whatever you want to do.”
  • “You’re giving up your baby to great parents. That’s not selfish.”
  • “That’s so selfish of you to not even think of your baby. Of course they want to know you more than two strangers just raising them!”
  • “Wait, so you’re adopting a baby?”
  • “I don’t think I’d be able to love a child that isn’t my blood.”
  • “You already love them so much. It’s obviously meant to be.”
  • “How much does a baby cost, anyway? Can’t you just buy a dog and call it even?”
  • “Are you afraid your paperwork will get rejected?”
  • “Does traveling to get your baby scare you?”
  • “Will you change their name?”
  • “Did something happen to the parents?”
  • “I’m certain you’re strong enough to answer their questions when they’re old enough to ask them.”
  • “You shouldn’t keep secrets about their life. Don’t lie to them about being adopted.”
  • “I wouldn’t call it lying. I would call it being selective. They don’t have to know they didn’t come out of your womb, right?”

Childrearing

  • “Once you have a kid, you lose everything. Your sex life, your party life, your quiet life. It’s gone.” 
  • “Those eighteen years go too fast.” 
  • “So what’s more exciting? The poopie Picassos at 3am or the green bean Van Goghs at dinner?”
  • “I guess you haven’t heard a modern music station in the past year. I guess you’ve memorized the soundtrack to the latest cartoon musical!”
  • “So is the sugary cereal for them or are you happy you get an excuse to eat it again?”
  • “Be honest. You play with your kid’s toys more than they do.”
  • “When they call for you, you feel like a superhero because you are their super hero.”
  • “When you accept that a toddler is just a tiny drunk college student having a meltdown, you start to feel better.”
  • “If I have to sit through the Wiggles one more time…”
  • “I like hanging out with you more than my child-free friends. You have food. You have ice pops. You also have Disney movies.”
  • “Lego bombs. Oh my god, lego bombs in the carpet..”
  • “The minivan was probably the sensible purchase.”
  • “I had no idea a baby could fart that loud!”
  • “Dressing baby girls is fun. Then they age three years and the boys get the better, tasteful clothing. Girls? No they get the glitter bombs from hell.”
  • “They say you love them the first time you hold them.”
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Send a ♚ if you like my writing. Bonus points for why!

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My muse is being held hostage and is being experimented on. Send me “What have they done to you?” for my muse’s response to yours finding them shackled and chained in a small room.

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Go anon and pretend to be my character’s child,

inboxideas:

➤ BUT HERE’s the CATCH! :

Try to incorporate in it a fact/reference to the other parent (without saying their name/URL/ship).

I’ll answer the anon and then also try to guess the ship, or say which one I think the child would belong best from.

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Send me a ▲ for an unpopular opinion

knickers-and-nicotine:

optional: include a category (roleplay, specific fandoms, food, idk whatever you want)

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Shit Anna Kendrick Has Said Meme. ( PART ONE. )

"I'm the person who wouldn't send back my food even if I got steak when I'd ordered fish."
"I don't care for physical activity. I'm not sporty. I'm not very coordinated."
"Nobody pulls a prank like George Clooney."
"Sometimes the best part of my day is imagining what I'm gonna eat when I get off work."
"Yes, but maybe if I HAD these tiny whimsical bowls I WOULD throw dinner parties..."
"Can we drop the pretense of "President's Day" and just call it "I needed a long weekend because Valentine's Day is garbage"
"I'm done being embarrassed about my boring taste in sushi. If it looks like it killed Nemo's mom, I'm not eating it."
"What if I'm a sleepwalker, except I'm so lazy that even when I sleepwalk I just lie in bed?"
“I like my men like I like my coffee. Silent.”
"It's cute how I used to think this 'barely holding it together' feeling was temporary."
"I'm so humble it's crazy. I'm like the Kanye West of humility."
"Sometimes I think, I need to think before I speak. And then other times I think, I shouldn't leave the house or interact with people ever."
"Yes of course I got your text - I'm just ignoring it. Don't make it weird."
"I like to think of myself less like "an adult" and more like a "former fetus."
"It still blows my mind that I'm at an age where if I got pregnant people would be happy for me."
"I don't get why girls paint the "Chanel" symbol on their nails... I could tattoo it on my ass but it don't mean I'm fancy."
"So, there's NO existing service that rents puppies to people with hangovers? America, you have failed me."
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Send me hearts

roleplayers-ink:

  • 💖 - I admire you
  • 💓 - You give me feels
  • 💜 - You’re intimidating
  • 💌  - We should talk more
  • 💟 - How are you so cute
  • 💝 - Love seeing you on my dash
  • 💗 - I miss interacting with you
  • 💞 - You’re amazing at ______
  • 💘  - I’m crushing on you
  • 💕  - I ship you with ______ 
  • ♥ - You make me uncomfortable
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Send me “Mun play” and I will play as myself for a thread with your muse.

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Historical RP starters

alternativesettings:

alternativesettings-deactivated:

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Under the cut you will find 40 RP starters that are best suited for a historical/set in the past threads. Contains fluff, angst and all the casual ordeal. 
Feel free to use them as Starters alone, or incorporate into longer threads.

Bonus idea:

  • Send ✎ and I will generate a random number from 1 to 40 and will write a starter based on it.

Keep reading

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